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You Really Should Be Playing This Game: Portal By: PoisonRamune, the Apathetic Lizardman I play a lot of horror/suspense themed games; however, I rarely get scared by them. One of the only times I’ve gotten scared while playing a game was about 10 years ago, I was playing Resident Evil 2 on a rainy night and my dad busted in my room to ask if I wanted fried chicken or hot links for dinner. I literally yelled “Don’t eat me!” or something to that extent when my dad opened my door.
I find it funny that Portal, the last video game I beat had me on edge in the same way and it wasn’t even supposed to be a horror game. Portal is a first person puzzle game that uses Valve’s Source engine (the same engine that powers: Left 4 Dead, Team Fortress 2 and CounterStrike: Source). The gameplay revolves around the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, a gun that creates portals on almost any flat surface. You play as a test subject in the Aperture Enrichments Center lab, who’s seemingly there to test the portal gun’s capabilities (and also, man’s capacity for reasoning). Using the environment and the bizarre (yet strict) physics of the inter-spatial portals, you are to make your way through 19 different test chambers of increasing difficulty. Some of the more common things you need to do in order to progress are: using the portals to reach inaccessible areas (too high/footpath blocked by obstacles), entering a portal at high speeds to be “launched” from another portal at the same speed, or using the portals as a means of stealth travel to avoid sentry turrets.
With only 19 test chambers, the game does play very quickly. In fact, I was able to beat the game in one afternoon (about 5 hours of play). This makes it really good if you have commitment issues or run a gaming website and can’t seem to finish your new games. Though the puzzles were very innovative and fulfilling to beat, the game’s staying power comes from the story. Within the first 2 minutes of starting a new game, you’ll be introduced to your guide and the story’s narrator “GLaDOS,” an ominous voice over a PA that sounds like a mix between a generic British lady and the Lost in Space robot. GLaDOS will not only guide you through the testing procedures. She’ll also congratulate/nurture you and tell you little tidbits about human conditioning. Despite GLaDOS’ calm, motherly nature you’ll start to notice something is a little off with “her” as you progress through the game. Occasionally her voice will “glitch” at very inappropriate times, often in the middle of giving you some sort of advice or warning that can save your life. Towards the end of the game, you’ll find out what’s really going on with her (we’ll keep it a surprise, since it’s really half the fun of the game). The facelessness of GLaDOS, her seemingly automated monologue (as evidenced by her occasional nonsequitor comments), and things you’ll discovery about Aperture Labs while playing work in tandem to give you a really creepy Twilight Zone type vibe as you play.
The graphics in the game are amazing, even on my crappy 1980’s SD-TV which is kind of getting dark on me. It never ceases to amaze me as to how spot on Valve is with their graphics. While I’m by no means a graphics whore (see: I own a crappy SD-TV) I’ve always noticed that Valve’s games are always on the cutting edge; they were able to make pitch black darkness look amazing (ie: Left 4 Dead), it shouldn’t be a wonder whi Portal looks so good. Even for a boring, grayed out laboratory theme; Portal is amazing with its architecture and device design. Not only are the levels made for functionality, they were also made so you wouldn’t feel like shooting yourself from visual/patterned monotony. The audio in the game is very appropriate and well produced. However, that’s honestly all I can say about it. But you also need to realize that this was also a design choice by Valve, since the game is set in a boring laboratory and all of the ambient noises were probably made to sound like boring lab noises (and not rock opera).
All in all, you really should be playing this game. The game retails at $10 in stores or for $20 with the Orange Box (and you get 4 other really great games with it, which I might review later. When I get around to beating the Half Life games), so price point can’t be used as an excuse (unless you’re in the Ron, Josh and Gavin club). Also, the fact that the game takes 5 hours to beat (and those 5 hours are an overestimation, since I really sucked at the game in the beginning) makes “I have no time to play” pretty void. The only thing that should be keeping you back is system, but honestly your 5-6 year old econo-laptop should even be able to get this game running (albeit, it may be with lowest settings). Whether you pick it up from your local game store, buy it on Live Arcade, get it from Steam, or borrow it from a friend you really should be playing this game!
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